Once upon a time there was a fish named Henry Happyfish. Henry wasn’t always a happy little fish. There was a time in his life when he was under threats to his life and health. You see, Henry was bought by a nice woman named Lori, who loves all creatures great and small, but she has a medical condition that makes her forgetful. She then fell in love with a handsome prince named Mark, or so she thought, but his real name was Mike.
It was around this time that life got really bad for Henry. Lori mistakenly put some aggressive fish in the tank with Henry and they attacked him several times. Henry was a peaceful fish who didn’t like to fight, but he was also known to hold his own in a no holds barred scrap. Henry warned the little guys not to mess with him, but they wouldn’t listen. Early one morning Henry was peacefully swimming around looking for food, when the Siamese fighting fish attacked. Henry performed a spirited defense and left the attackers swimming in circles due to their injuries. They came to the conclusion that Henry wasn’t kidding, they said, “Look at us now! I wish we would have listened.” They then decided to move to a new neighborhood.
Now, poor Henry was left in a tank all by himself, with nobody to rattle gills with, and he grew very lonely. His tank was getting dirtier and dirtier and Henry was getting to be very sad. Lori still cared for Henry and even rented an entire apartment just for him to live in, but he was still sad. Henry asked God to help him out and he was heard. Mark, I mean Mike, awoke one evening and said to Lori that we must rescue Henry. Lori brought Henry home to Mike’s the next day. It took several hours for Mike and Lori to clean out Henry’s tank so that he could live in a clean environment. Lori’s son Joel even tried to help but there was a TV show he didn’t want to miss.
After the cleaning Henry was placed in a clean bowl with clean water and fresh food. His spirits started to pick up, but he still seemed to be a little short on serotonin. After discussing Henry’s sad state of mind with noted marine psychologist Dr. Grinfin, it was decided to expand Henry’s home and get him some friends to visit. Along comes Dwayne and Doris, two pretty black fish who only fight with each other, and Roger and Faye who are nice but Roger swims backward and Faye keeps trying to get out of the tank to head for Europe. Well ole’ Henry took to his new pals like Tim Carter to a teenburger. He now spends his days swimming in the new tank where he has lots of room to swim and play with his new friends.
As they say, he will live happily ever after.
Jeffrey the Curious Mouse
Once upon a time there was a mouse named Jeffrey, who was a curious little rodent, he was also a bit paranoid, but that’s another story. Jeffrey was born in an ambulance in the garage at a pulp mill. Of course Jeffrey and his family weren’t supposed to be living in the ambulance, but they were too crafty to be caught by the humans that would have stepped on their heads.
Jeffrey’s mom was named Jennifer who always taught him to be a good boy and not to over analyze things in life, and he did try, but he was not always successful. He used to walk all over the pulp mill always watchful for the dangers that can befall a little mouse. One day he was about to go on a walkabout when the garage door suddenly opened, an emergency! A strange man named Rodney was rushing to get into the driver’s seat. Wow, thought Jeffrey, is the team out of doughnuts? Pizza? What could be the problem?
Rodney quickly drove over to the door at the mill where the team was gathered around big ole Bert who was injured in a valiant attempt at grabbing an airborne chicken wing. Bert did succeed, but hurt himself when he landed, leaving an imprint on the cement floor, (something had to give). Jeffrey laid low and stayed hidden while the 8 man team called for re enforcements, to no avail. It was coffee time and nobody could help. After a short conference a decision was made to load Bert with the forklift, which worked well. The door was quickly closed and they were off to the hospital.
The ambulance attendant was a woman named Annie who spoke quietly to Bert and hooked him up to a chicken flavored oxygen tank. Meanwhile Jeffrey was watching all the events from his hiding place wondering what was going to happen next when he saw a movement near the front of the ambulance. It was Trevor! Trevor was a crafty little weasel who had been after Jeffrey for years. Jeffrey’s life was saved more than once, by Trevor’s speech impediment, a nasal whining sound that came out of him whenever he moved or was upset, which was often.
Annie saw Trevor first, and tried to shield Bert, but the crafty little weasel whipped around her and took a bite out of the big guy. Well Ole' Bert's fist came down on Trevor's head causing his beady little eyes to jut out. Not to be outdone, Trevor struck again but Bert caught him and threw him against the back door of the ambulance, just inches away from Jeffrey's hiding spot. It was Jeffery's lucky day, Trevor was smart enough to know when the battle was lost and crawled away, muttering to himself, "I told them guys, I’ll get him one day”.
Meanwhile back at the mill, Roger the Gopher and his trusty sidekick Timmy the Squirrel were having a discussion on how to pronounce the word “wash”. A lot of animals around the mill had been trying to help Roger with his problem, to no avail. Roger fancied himself as a wise little rodent, but every time he started making a speech, nobody could understand him. The last time he started his dialogue he came under gunfire, but luckily it was Murray Saskatchewan
The mood at the hospital was pretty upbeat and Bert’s injuries weren’t too severe, Jeffrey was watching for predators as he scurried into emergency, his curiosity getting the better of him. After a quick pass through the ward he noticed that Dr. Bellamy was the attending physician. Bellamy was a nice man and a fine doctor, but he had an identity crisis, he couldn’t decide if he should be a Neo Nazi or a just a good ole country doctor. “So, Bert, you are back again” said Dr Bellamy, “Those chicken wings will be the death of you, you aren’t as agile as you used to be.” "Yeah I know, doc, I'm working on it and will try harder."
Back behind the mill, Dewayne the Duck, was fluttering about trying to get his charges in order. It was not an easy job, and Dewayne was stressed. Newman the Groundhog, was in a particularly foul mood, as was his nature. He was upset about some members of his flock dropping over to visit, unannounced. Newman had told them many times that there wasn't a welcome mat at his front door for a reason.
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Posted by: Albert | June 09, 2008 at 07:37 AM